Innocence

First off, it’s been a while since I posted mostly ’cause I had’ta reformat my computer n lost a bunch of stuff n ’cause I’ve just been enjoyin’ life n bein’ busy packin in real life to move soon! ~does a happy dance~

But last night I made the first video I’d made in a while so if you haven’t seen it, or just wanna see it again, here it is!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s-U9EHpmkyk

N i wanna talk a lil bout what this video in particular means to me ’cause lately I’ve been goin’ thru some stuff, GOOD stuff, n it’s just been so amazin’ to see what people can see the real me n still love me just the same.  You see, few days ago, there was lotsa mischief goin’ on round willowdale, n i was watchin’ it n seein’ the kids who got in trouble, (you can even see some of the mischef in the video!~giggles~) n anyway i used to just be the good quiet kid, a lil’ hyper sometimes, but i never really misbehaved ever.  But then seein’ these kids n how adults dealt with ’em made me wonder, “What if *I* did that?  What would mommy do?”  So I talked to mommy bout it n we talked real long n serious like bout what would happen n what consequences would be n it just felt real safe to finally just be a kid n not feel like i had’ta worry bout bein’ good all the time.

n so one nite even for the first time while we were playin’ round in willowdale *I* even got a lil bit naughty n it wasn’t nuthin’ major but i started to feel so so so intensely little!  It’s like even my emotionas felt 4 n i felt that scared little kid inside who didn’t know how mommy was gunna react n then, when she still loved me n was there for me mys heart just felt so so safe n little n loved n i think my second life just got that much more meaningful to me ’cause now i know i can be me completely n no matter what that is, it’s ok.

so that’s kinda where the video came from, was just findin’ that innocence again, even inside of mischef n random bits of naughtyness, there’s just been this innocence surroundin’ everythin’ n i don’t never want it to end.

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